Don't Forget Your Medication, Especially at a Funeral

 Funerals are funny. At funerals, you expect time to stop because time has stopped for the person in the casket. Everyone is taken out of their context and put into black, business-casual wear, and then gathered at some somber place. It’s almost like you’ve walked into an old black and white Hollywood film, a familiar and cliché setting. Oh, and it’s always grey outside.

     At least that’s what I thought my grandma’s funeral would be like. I mean, it was grey outside and the place was dreadful. Time did stop for me, but only for like 5 minutes. When the ceremony began, I noticed a damn Starbucks cup two feet away from my grandma’s casket, then I hear my cousin-in-law, Tom, smacking on his gum. In the back, my niece is messing with the new snapchat filters, and next to me, my cousins are making sex jokes. Traditional Vietnamese funerals last for days. I could only make one of the days and that one was from 10am-9pm. Eleven hours of this crap was not the way I wanted to say goodbye to my grandma. To make things worse, some asshole leaves in the middle of the family gathering for God knows what. Welp, that asshole was I. I forgot my fucking medication and I needed to go to the Kaiser pharmacy.

     Let’s backtrack a little. Two Fridays ago, I went to my English class and pitched my blog idea about medication for mental disorders. This is ironic because after class, I went straight to the bus heading to San Francisco, and I forgot my medication. I panicked. Why? Because the last time I decided to stop my medication, my bipolar brain went haywire. Let me just vaguely explain how I reacted to stopping my medication a few months ago: I was basically bedridden and when I had to go outside, I felt like my anxiety was going to push against my skin until I exploded into a million pieces, just like that dynamited whale. If you haven’t seen that video, by the way, you really should. Actually, here’s a link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFwxH3PPWiU Watch it now. Isn’t it just the best? Anyways, on the bus, I texted my doctor and asked her if my brain was going to crash if I didn’t get the medication. She didn’t answer my question. She just told me to find the nearest pharmacy to my destination so she could call in for my prescription.

     The one time I chose to stop taking my meds without my doctor knowing was because the medication wasn’t working, but without new medication, my brain was left to do as it pleased and what it did was go through a withdrawal. A lot of people downplay how important medication is. Not very many people think about how untreated illness and nonadherence to medication can lead to psychosis, mania, hypomania, mania, relapse, and suicide. So, if you happen to be thinking of stopping without doctor supervision, DON’T. Please, please, please don’t. If you have a friend taking medication, be supportive and if you can, make sure they’re making their appointments.

Here are some links to read about medicine adherence. I ordered them from audience friendly to analytical:

http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2010/09/medication-non-compliance/

http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/articles/managing-compliance

http://ps.psychiatryonline.org/doi/pdf/10.1176/appi.ps.52.3.378

     So, even tough I was at a funeral, I decided to pick up my medication. When I returned to the funeral I cried a lot and weirdly enough, I laughed a lot. Yeah, my day was inconvenient, my family annoyed me, and they made really inappropriate sex jokes while my dead grandma was lying in the same fucking room, but life is just fat satire with tons of contradictions. Time didn’t stop at that funeral and it will never. Starbucks will still be open, Tom will keep on chewing his gum, my family will always be crass, and I will always have more to learn about my mental health. It was God's bizarre way of telling me that even though my grandma passed, life goes on for everyone, even for her. I see her in my wonderful and annoying ass family and I see her in me and god dammit, we are one good-looking family. You did well, Grandma.

 

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This Post is not Funny

Sajatovic Martha, M.D. Davies Marilyn, R.N., Ph.D. Hrouda Debra R., M.S.S.A., L.I.S.W., 2004, Enhancement of Treatment Adherence among Patients with Bipolar disorder, Psychiatric Services Volume 55 Issue 3, pp. 264-269

     This study explores the noncompliance of bipolar patients with their medication. Because this is a scientific research article, it is very straightforward, basing its writing primarily on science rather than philosophy. Its outline is also very clear: conflict, research, results, and finally, the possible solutions.

     According to the American Journal of Psychiatry, about one third of patients take under 30% of their medication. The article makes a point that researching this is a matter of urgency because nonadherence is a frequent cause of relapse and suicide. Hypomanic denial, psychosis, age, etc. can lead to noncompliance.

     This study is transparent with its research methods, making sure its reader understands how the results are retrieved. It is also easy to understand, even for a nonmedical student. There is an organized list of how adherence is measured (self-report, physician report, visit frequencies, etc.). It also points out some flaws in the methods, implying that some studies do not always lead to clear conclusions.

     Based on the results, they selected the methods that produced the best adherence. This includes group therapy and interventions alongside family, friends, and partners. In its conclusion, they acknowledge that this issue is still needs more research. However, it also ends on a positive note: there is sufficient research on adherence to schizophrenia medication that can be used to better understand adherence amongst bipolar patients.

     This article can be used for papers researching: mental disorder medication, bipolar, effective therapy, and adherence to medication. 

Hello, world, I am medicated!

Hello, world, I am medicated!

    I’ll have you know that I don’t usually start my conversations like that, but I needed a hook so, what the hell. Disclaimer: this blog is not meant for you to feel bad for me and it definitely is not a place I’ll be spilling my problems. You can go on any teenage Tumblr page if reading angsty sadness is your favorite pastime, but if that’s really the case, you should probably consider getting a therapist too.

    Last summer, I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and over Thanksgiving break, I was also diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I was given these little white pills and those didn’t work so we maximized the dose. That made things worse. Then I had to try different little white pills paired with other little white pills. I felt like a lab rat. In this blog, I am actually going to intentionally use myself as a lab rat. Healthy, right? RIGHT. As of recent, I’m trying to befriend these pills rather than hate them; I want to understand them rather than be anxious about them. 

    You’re probably thinking that I’m a very sad human being and my life is just a terrible hellhole. WELL, you’re right, but you’re only half right. You have shitty days don’t you? You also have good days and so do I. In fact, I’m a very happy person. Most of my close friends, the ones who know about my disorders and the ones who don’t, would agree with me. I’m not living in denial or anything. I know myself very well; you’re just going to have to trust me. I don’t suggest you trust any stranger on the Internet, but just trust me, because, reasons.

     I am weird. My life is weird, toes are weird, and you’re also weird. My therapist says I should use more descriptive words and stop using the word “weird” because it doesn’t really mean much. Sorry, therapist whom I respect very much. What I’m trying to say is, we all have our unique experiences and I am here to share mine with you, friend. Can I call you that? Since I can’t receive your answer right now, I’m just going to assume your answer is, “No, we are not friends,” and to that I respond, “Right on, friend!” and proceed to give you finger guns and a fantastical wink. I’m getting off track. Anyways, friend, in this blog, I want to share with you what I’ve learned so far about mental health medication and what I will be learning in the next 15 weeks. Here are some questions that will hopefully be answered by the end of this series:

-How do doctors give a diagnosis?

-How do they prescribe medicine?

-What are the different philosophies concerning mental health medication?

-How far have we come in medication and what information are we lacking?

-How much does our chemistry and genetics play a role in our overall happiness?

I will do my research to make this blog seem more legit and useful. I hate research, but we’re friends. So, you’re welcome.

     Why am I blogging this, you ask? Because this is a school assignment and I’m paying for tuition, BUT also because there is a lot to be learned. According to a study from the CDC (2009-2012), 48.7% of Americans have taken at least one prescription drug within a given month (http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/drug-use-therapeutic.htm). Look, we’re learning already. That’s a lot of people. You or a loved one can be suffering from mental illness and it’s important to be educated in the subject to better aid yourself or those around you. Consider this post syllabus day, my friends. It’s going to get real, a little uncomfortable at times, but most importantly, it’s going to be damn fun. Until next time, gang.

                                                                        Sincerely,

                                                                        Friend                                                

P.S. If want to read other blogs about mental health, I made the extra effort of reading horribly boring blogs so that you don’t have to. Here are the hip and fun ones. WOO! Happy reading! 

1. http://www.buzzfeed.com/mentalhealthweek
2. http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/
3. http://chipur.com/