Medicating the Bipolar Creative Genius

"Sharp Blues" Artist: ME (helpful, I know)

"There is no great genius without a touch of madness"- Aristotle

My mentor and therapist often say I have to contain my "creative genius". It's their weird way of saying that even though I don't find normality interesting, I should strive for stability. I am a singer-songwriter, painter, sculptor, and graphic designer. With that being said, my life is very abstract. The other day, my therapist said to me, "Your goal is to keep the creative genius while only gaining the beneficial parts of the madness." She said that we don't need another Janis Joplin because she killed herself. It's a recurring theme in our sessions. She said the same thing about Robin Williams. I'm not sure how I feel about being categorized with these people. They're legends, but they're also dead. I'm not suicidal, but I can see how my impulsive and obsessive tendencies can freak my mentors out.

Research has shown that mental disorders tend to be prevalent in creative communities, but other experts say those results are faulty. There is no hard answer for it, but I can understand both perspectives. 

Supporting research for correlation:

"In the 1970s, Nancy Andreasen carried out the first empirical study of creativity and mental disorder at the University of Iowa. Andreasen studied the mental histories of a group of 30 prominent authors, expecting to find a strong correlation between creativity and schizophrenia. Although she found no history of schizophrenia amongst the authors, she did find an unexpectedly strong history of mood disorders: 80 per cent of her sample of authors had experienced at least one episode of major depression, hypomania, or mania, compared to only 30 per cent of a matched control group. Andreasen followed-up the authors for the next 15 years and found that 43 per cent of them had bipolar disorder compared to only 10 per cent of the control group and 1 per cent of the general population. During the 15 years of the follow-up study, two of the authors committed suicide." (https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hide-and-seek/201203/bipolar-disorder-and-creativity)

Let's assume that the correlation is true. Bipolar people experience mania and depression. When they experience episodes, creativity is an outlet to relieve them of their symptoms. Bipolar disorder, for me, means that I am hyperaware of my existence. When my feelings start to overwhelm me, whether it is because of circumstance or because of my disorder, I can't seem to find words to understand it. When I feel "abnormal" I have to create something new to dissect it. In a way, it's my survival tactic. 

On the other hand, this idea is romanticized. The research is flawed because it creates conclusions with loose correlations. How can creativity be measured? Even if the person is both creative and bipolar, does it mean the person is creative because of their disorder? Van Gogh is an idolized example of the "creative genius," but in one of his letters he wrote, "Oh if I could have worked without this accursed disease, what things I might have done." While mental disorder can fuel creativity, it can also hinder it. When I'm manic, I can't focus, and when I'm depressed, I am paralyzed. Although my art is often inspired by my dips and my highs, it is during the in-between that I am capable of creating. This is the case for many people who suffer bipolar disorder. 

This connection between insanity and genius creates a dilemma for those deciding to take mood stabilizers. Will medication hinder a person's creativity? Will it "flatten" them out? I can't answer that and the experts can't really answer that either. With medication, it's all about test and trial. Medicine can definitely dull a person, but the same medication can also allow another person to think more clearly. It's ultimately the patient's choice to go through those tests and trials. No one can be forced to take medication.

I personally decided to take the risk. I realized that I didn’t like the way I behaved during my episodes. However, It’s still not black and white for me. I’m guilty of liking my manic episodes from time to time and when I am in a neutral state, I fall into an immense boredom. I'm at a stage where I'm not sure my medication is working yet, but I know I'm still creative, so that's good. Anyways, thanks for reading my millionth ramble! I’ll keep you posted.